We are continuing to look at ways to help keep us feeling as bright and as sunny as possible even when life might have other ideas. As we looked at in the last blog ‘Sun’, this weather metaphor of our emotional states is ultimately the best on
The clouds are the things that can just blow in from nowhere and overshadow that inner brightness and joy that we had been experiencing. We have to accept that we can’t change what life throws at us, but we can work to find the best ways to deal with them. If we let things overpower us then we just let those clouds follow us around – just like in the movie ‘The Addams Family’; there were times when family members just had a big cloud hanging over them and wherever they walked, it just stayed right above their heads. I think this is a great way to look at how we can feel if we let things overshadow us and we let those issues overwhelm us. If we can’t let things go then it is natural that they will follow us around, like that Addams Family cloud looming over us.
We have to accept that we can’t always change what is happening but that it is very important to not get over absorbed in these things. Of course, big, and traumatic things in our lives will always do this but if we are letting the smaller things in life do this to us then we are going to find our lives and moods negatively affected because of this. What is always good to consider is how much of an impact this should be having on us, if we are aware that we are overreacting to some of the smaller issues in our life then it’s time to change these responses. What is needed if that is the case, is to find ways to press pause on the worries and choose to change the things you can and let go of the things you can’t. This will help you to not get overshadowed by the situation and maybe even let your inner happiness start to shine through again. If we focus on things and continue to overthink them then we are just carrying that worry cloud around with us. This isn’t fun, it won’t make the situation any better, and why waste our lives in this way? Never forget that the sun never goes in, it is just that the clouds stop us from seeing it.
What you can do is find ways to distract yourself from the worries that have come with the issues that have started to overshadow your life. Worry doesn’t help, it isn’t the answer, so it’s time to just let it go. In these times you can choose to do something more productive, or enjoyable, invest in a talking book, or new song playlist that can help to plug the gaps through the day. For most of us when we are busier, we often worry less, it’s time on our hands that can be the enemy to our minds. It’s those times when we can literally be doing our own heads in. Now we know this, we can start to stop this from happening, it’s time to find ways to let those worries go, which is the key to a happier life. If we nip this in the bud then we can often find this much easier to move away from, if we have already given it a big chunk of our time then our minds have started those worry habits up already.
Staying clear about how you approach those everyday ups and down is a great way to keep us from inadvertently feeding those worry habits. I think a zero-tolerance rule is a great idea whereby we work hard to not go down those routes of worry, with a good distraction plan. It doesn’t matter what we do as long as we can distract ourselves away from worrying. Never forget that being busy is not always enough to be distracted. Being distracted is when we are so absorbed in the moment that we forget about ourselves. For some of us it might take double distraction; we listen to a talking book while we colour in a picture. Remember, don’t choose things that you don’t like doing as it will just be boring to you and you won’t be able to hold the focus on that activity. Having a list of things to inspire you to choose from is another good idea as sometimes we can feel at a loss of what we could do to plug the gaps. If we flood our minds with something else then we just can’t worry, we get a bit of time when our minds and bodies can relax and allow that inner peace and happiness to start to return.
Life is always going to be a challenge at times and those clouds will blow into your life but with a plan at hand to choose to not get over-worried by them, you can enjoy a happier life. If you’re living a happier life, the people around you will feel your positive mood and mindset, and for your children you are setting great examples for them. Don’t let any of those unnecessary worries block out your sunshine, choose to stay worry-free. Have a great day. Sara x