Listen to me

Watch me

We have been looking at fears and phobias over the last few weeks and how that inner chatter will be negatively impacting how you are feeling and that trying to reassure ourselves with these comfort blankets is just not working, it is having the adverse effect and it could be starting to smother us. Let’s look at how we can be pulling our minds down into these fear cycles, which are stuck in this negative mindset and how this impacts the inner chatter of our unconscious mind. Again, it’s time for you to take stock of how you interact with those internal dialogues, if our mind keeps reminding us that say flying is scary, we can keep focusing on the fear and looking ahead through those inner thoughts of fear. All we will be doing is increasing the fear, throwing more fear onto fear is like throwing lighter fuel onto a fire, it is just going to escalate how we are feeling by tenfold. This effect then can cause catastrophic inner responses and will be compounding your fears and anxieties, then moving them up to the next level of fear.

Our unconscious mind never switches off, whether we are asleep, daydreaming, in a coma or under general anaesthetic our inner minds are always listening and functioning.  This means every thought is adding to our inner minds existing fear responses, the more we think OMG how will be? Are we going to get anxious? How will we cope? This will just be negatively fuelling our minds.  What we are creating is our own internal horror movie that we then add to each time we play it, it can get bigger and scarier until we can feel overwhelmed totally by it. This is a fear that has grown into the horror movie phobic response, set on the internal loop in our minds, sending out the fear messages to every part of our minds, body and nervous system.  Most of us have watched a horror movie and at times we can end up on the edge of our seats, just waiting for the cliff hanger moment to unfold. We can find even though it is just a movie, that we can still feel ourselves feeling tense, we might feel that nervous feeling in our stomachs, our hearts might be racing as well. We know clearly in our rational conscious mind that this is just on the TV and isn’t real but that still doesn’t stop those feeling from growing within us and when it gets to those intense moments of the film we can even jump, shout out and even scream in fear. 

This is just what is happening when we start listening and feeding our inner thoughts the more we connect to them the bigger they grow, just like how they build the suspense in a film. But we are doing this to ourselves, it can be just fuelled with ….will I be ok? What will happen? Will I panic? All of these connects to what will happen are all negative and will create your inner horror movie. Now that you know how you are fuelling this, you can start to change this, remember as in the last blog up there is no point at all in telling yourself that you’re ok, if you’re not.  Always remember that if you don’t believe it then your inner mind won’t either. What you need to do is get back into the moment and start living in the now, the best ways to do that is to start connecting to where you are and what is happening around you. If you’re heading to the doctors to have a blood test then what you need to do is spend the time before focused on what you are doing staying very present in the now. If you are struggling with this then it’s good to do double distraction whereby you can be doing the cleaning while learning French or listening to a talking book. If our minds are full of being distracted and being in the moment then there is no time left to listen to those old toxic inner habits. Also, if we are busy doing things and our mind is distracted then we can’t fuel the thoughts either, so it’s a win … win situation.

The best way is to have a plan of things that you can do to keep busy by being distracted, don’t leave it to chance make a list and have it on your phone. If you leave it to chance, we can become a rabbit in the headlights and then we won’t be able to think of anything to distract ourselves with. Also, by that time the thoughts will be building in your mind creating the horror movie and this is way harder to stop then before it has fully started to escalate. Your best to make about 10 ideas that you can do, it’s going to be personal for you but here are a few ideas of things that you can do. Talking books, spell words backwards, music playlist, learn a language, listen to my blogs, download podcasts, download a fast-moving game to play, have a friend on standby to call and chat to.  Make your list, get things downloaded and ready and then you can quickly access a distraction if you need it.

If you’re going to do something that you are phobic too or that worries you, it is best to plan the time beforehand, so that your super busy this will help too. But always remember these thoughts aren’t real they are just an old horror movie playing in your head, over time you mind will stop sending it if you, but you have to work to stop listening to it.

Thanks for dropping by Sara x

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