We have been looking at building confidence over the last few weeks and today we are adding a new way of thinking to help you on the journey to become that safe and secure person inside. Confidence is a learned and developed habit and lots of people say to me well I am confident but I still feel insecure or anxious about things. This is because we have outer confidence the part of us that can shine at work, or handle those difficult situations with the children or life in general. But then in other situations we can feel insecure and nervous about things we don’t feel safe and secure about, which can have a negative impact on our overall confidence. Never forget that our mind is just like a massive computer and it’s the inputs and outputs we make in our lives which makes it function in the way that it does, so to be more confident we need input more confident and secure thoughts and experiences. Over time then we will find that out mind will then start out putting these confidence responses and you will then as they say be cooking on gas. Once we have our mind sending us the messages that we are sure and secure in what we do then our confidence will just continue to grow.
What we need is to be SURE, that we are secure about what we are doing in the experience we are having or the response we are giving. Being sure about things is a real sign of confidence, confident people will know their own minds and follow their instinct in making choices. Even if this doesn’t go with what other people are expecting from them, if we are doing something and we are not sure it is right then this will knock of own inner feelings of safety and security. Over big situations this can be more of a challenge but let’s start finding smaller things in your life that you can start to feel sure about what we are doing and let the messages head deep into your mind. Sometimes we may go along with everyone else, which don’t get me wrong we do need to compromise, as there is no I in team and many things in life are a team effort. But if we don’t allow ourselves to have a voice then our inner sides of ourselves will always be unsure, as the messages have always been to go with the flow, do what everyone else wants. Our mind will take these patterns as messages that you are not secure in what you are doing and that you have to have everyone else be secure for you. There are things in life that we can choose and feel safe to do that, even if it’s just- where shall we meet for dinner, think about the places that would suit you all and make suggestions. Be the one that starts to take a more of a leading role in your life and the experiences you are having, it’s not about demanding and it doesn’t matter if it doesn’t go your way. The important thing is that you have a voice and can start feeling sure about the things you are thinking, considering and doing.
Take the time to think about who is the one making the suggestions for things in your life and if it’s not you, then these situations have been inadvertently sending unsure messages to your mind. Choosing where to eat isn’t a massive thing, but over time the messages that will be received by your mind can make massive changes. Think of a few other areas where you can have a say, try and choose one for work, home and socially and start being more proactive in how you approach these things. If you take the time to look at what’s happening you may notice that its certain people that take the lead, it won’t often be that they want it all their way but in odd situation it will be. But mainly it will be that they are very used to you saying sure to whatever they suggest to you and they are just used to being more confident in taking the lead. To be honest they might really enjoy having time out from this role and this will be an ideal time for you to start building that inner confidence. Every time you do this, the messages you are sending to that part of you that is developing your confidence is another step forward in doing this. What we need to do is get to that place where we do feel totally sure in what we are doing even if these means other people aren’t as keen. Of course, if it’s a dinner reservation then the person who is demanding it their way isn’t being fair, but if it is a very important choice for you then it’s safe to be sure in doing it your way. With these messages growing within you, you will start feeling more secure in the situations that come your way and start to listen more to your Instinct. If someone else was making a massive choice in their lives, we would of course want them to choose what feels right to them, so do trust in the process that others will understand you.
Being confident is a great feeling it’s something we can take into every situation we come across and the more we challenge ourselves the surer we feel about the choices we are making. After you have mastered those situations you choose to challenge yourself over, don’t stop there move this into another area of your life. The more we strive to be confident the more we send those safe and secure messages within us, this is such a fantastic time for us in England to be ourselves. We don’t have to hide behind what we think other people want us to be for fear of what could happen. We are super lucky to be given this opportunity to embrace our own personal power and be that best version of ourselves. Life is much more fun when we are, and those anxieties and insecurity will fade as the confidence and inner safety and security grow.
Thanks for dropping by Sara x