The Cat Lives On blog looked at the issues of safety and security and if we don’t feel secure inside, we can start searching for it outside of ourselves. As you found out from the blog these habits of comforting ourselves with things has the opposite effect and tells our mind that we don’t feel secure.
This then adds to our original worries and anxieties; comfort blankets don’t work they just smother you. Now let’s try and pin point a few comfort blankets you may have in your life, maybe going to certain places makes you feel a bit nervous so you started to carry a bottle of water just in case you get a dry mouth, before you know it you can’t go out without it. Maybe it’s a bad stomach and you have to take Imodium, or maybe your comfort blanket is taking someone with you when you go to certain places. It doesn’t work long term to comfort yourself, it just breeds more insecurities.
Another way of feeding anxiety is avoidance, say if you feel uncomfortable around dogs you may say I can’t go near them, stroke them or go to a house with them. After time, we may start to cross the road when we see them, not go to the park, as they are more than likely will be there. The reality is, you’ve become more afraid of dogs while trying to avoid them, the avoidant habit is not helping you it’s become part of the problem. Your mind thinks that’s its keeping you safe helping you to avoid scary things, it doesn’t understand that you are nervous because you don’t feel safe inside and have created these irrational fears. Putting things off creates avoidance, avoidance creates fear and fear makes you anxious. If we want to be safe, secure and anxiety free we have to start acting this way over time we can then learn the habits to stay this way.
Thanks for dropping by,